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hungryperson11

Concealer for men

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Hi guys, so blushing has pretty much stopped being part of my life for the bones of a year now. It was torture for me so think it's important to let others know how I overcame it.

I've been using MAC studio finish concealer. To say this is a miracle product is an understatement. It has strong coverage and is completely invisible. I should add it's the NC line that cancels redness, the NW is useless. Personally, i use NC 15 or NC 20.

As a straight man, other people not noticing is obviously an important thing. I've also used recover correct and conceal, which is quite good. I found it too yellow though, and just doesn't have the coverage the MAC one does. 

It fully covers a light blush and the vast majority of a severe one. Anyway, In my experience severe ones don't just happen. I get a light one, know the other person can see I'm going red and then that leads to a severe one. 

Now, there's a couple of reasons why a man who has blushing problems wouldn't use it. First of all, it's emasculating. Well, yeah, it's not ideal. But if you are a chronic blusher I don't see how that is even a factor. For  me, blushing was as emasculating as it gets. It made me feel so powerless and ashamed to be me. Since I've been using this concealer I will flirt with work colleagues, click with everyone better, and get confrontational without fear. I use a feminine product and I've never felt more masculine. The irony is not lost on me.

I saw a poster on here once say to use make up is to admit you have a problem with blushing. Once again, i can only speak of my experience. It was all well and good to tell myself it wasn't a problem, but it absolutely fu***** was. It is a fact that the healthiest thing a blusher can do is talk about their blushing. I was unable to do that before. If i spoke about it i would immediately go deep red, so there was no way in hell i could bring it up. Since I've used this stuff i talk about it openly without fear, and its reduced the shame so much.

Lastly, you are not using concealer for vanity. It is the vanity factor you would get judged on. The way it see it i have a skin condition that needs treatment. I happily tell people i use a cream for my skin as it is prone to flushing and blushing. And everybody is completely understanding. Mind you i don't call it concealer, i call it a cream, but who the hell is going to know except those who are the very closest to me.

I can honestly say I've never been happier. You know when you badly need a piss but you have nowhere to go, it's pure torture. But the second you get to the toilet, the relief makes it all worthwhile. That's how i feel about this. I blushed for years, and it was often hell. But now that's it's over, the relief i feel makes me appreciate my life in a way people who never blushed can't appreciate.

I'm sure there's other great concealers out there that can work, like i said recover correct and conceal isn't bad. But with this MAC one i honestly never knew it is possible to be this effective and completely invisible. The scariest thing about using a concealer is in case it's obvious. With this one that's not a problem - just be sure it blends with the colour of your neck.

If anyone has any questions feel free to ask. It's so important to understand there is a way out of this.

 

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I'm a heterosexual male and I to have experimented with makeup to cover my blushing. And I absolutely hate it. I find it to be a huge hassle putting it on everyday, and constantly looking in mirrors to make sure it doesn't need to be touched up. It feels uncomfortable on my face. And as you said, it feels incredibly emasculating. I know you said that you think blushing makes you feel more emasculated than wearing makeup, but I have to respectfully disagree.

Now, you say that you tell people that you use a cream to cover a flushing/blushing problem. I must say that is pretty brave of you, and it's good that people are understanding. But I would worry that people will eventually figure out that it's makeup, if they haven't already. And let's be honest, there is a lot of social stigma against a guy using makeup. That's why so many male blushers here don't want to do it. I imagine that a guy who has a more "masculine" social circle (such as a guy who works in construction or something), could be severely harassed and rejected by his peers if they found out he wore makeup.

You also say that it's not obvious. But all it takes is one single day where you don't put it on quite right, or you accidentally rub your face and it smudges, in order for someone to notice. Even if it is unnoticeable 99% of the time, if you wear it everyday, it is practically guaranteed that someone is going to notice at some point. 

Regardless, I am very happy that you have found something that works for you. I'm just trying to have an open discussion and I am open minded to the idea of trying makeup again. It is just my opinion that a straight male using makeup to cover his blushing will often find that it just replaces one problem with another.

 

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Also, I've said this here before but it's worth saying again. The fact that makeup seems to be so good at hiding blushing makes me wonder why there are so many females with a blushing problem. Couldn't girls easily just hide their blushing with makeup? It makes no sense to me.

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3 hours ago, CodeRed said:

I'm a heterosexual male and I to have experimented with makeup to cover my blushing. And I absolutely hate it. I find it to be a huge hassle putting it on everyday, and constantly looking in mirrors to make sure it doesn't need to be touched up. It feels uncomfortable on my face. And as you said, it feels incredibly emasculating. I know you said that you think blushing makes you feel more emasculated than wearing makeup, but I have to respectfully disagree.

Now, you say that you tell people that you use a cream to cover a flushing/blushing problem. I must say that is pretty brave of you, and it's good that people are understanding. But I would worry that people will eventually figure out that it's makeup, if they haven't already. And let's be honest, there is a lot of social stigma against a guy using makeup. That's why so many male blushers here don't want to do it. I imagine that a guy who has a more "masculine" social circle (such as a guy who works in construction or something), could be severely harassed and rejected by his peers if they found out he wore makeup.

You also say that it's not obvious. But all it takes is one single day where you don't put in quite right, or you accidentally rub your face and it smudges, in order for someone to notice. Even if it is unnoticeable 99% of the time, if you wear it everyday, it is practically guaranteed that someone is going to notice at some point. 

Regardless, I am very happy that you have found something that works for you. I'm just trying to have an open discussion and I am open minded to the idea of trying makeup again. It is just my opinion that a straight male using makeup to cover his blushing will often find that it just replaces one problem with another.

 

I wouldn't overestimate the stigma. It's still there for sure, but we're talking concealer here - not foundation, mascara etc. You have to weigh an abstract stigma versus how badly consistent blushing affects your life and decide for yourself. And my openness about using creams for flushing and blushing is very handy because if someone does notice it then it makes no difference. Yep that's the cream i need for my skin condition. And even if the word changes from cream to concealer, it still stands - i have a skin condition that it helps with. That is 100% true.

With what you said about checking mirrors all the time. Oh man i was there. I used many products which were extremely hard to get right and like you said, it replaced one anxiety for another. I even went into makeup places - which was pretty scary as you can imagine - to get them to find a  product that was invisible and good coverage, and there just wasn't one.  I was on the verge of calling it quits and going back to blushing. A natural looking cream that can cover a blush seemed too much to ask for. As a last ditch effort there was a Mac store on a street i was on so i popped in (where one of the two people inside there was a biker with a beard- the world is changing!)

I genuinely could not believe how good this stuff was. I have asked very blunt friends  and co-workers can they see the cream I'm using, nobody ever can whereas they had with other products. I used to have to constantly check mirrors, but this stuff is on another level. It's so natural and easy to put on. JustIt's waterproof too so it won't get all smudgy in the rain as far as i know.  Just do not put it around where your eyebags would be.

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Thank you @CodeRed and @hungryperson11 for your input.

For me personally a makeup-type solution would also need to be virtually undetectable and simple so as not to disrupt life too much. Then again, I don't think I would mind if every once in a while someone were to notice something and I could simply say that it's a sunscreen, or cream, or whatever. It certainly seems like the lesser of two evils if the other option is going on Effexor permanently or even considering ETS. 

I've also been experimenting with recover correct and conceal - mixing with moisturizers etc. to dilute. Not happy with the results yet but I'm such an amateur at this sort of thing that there's room for improvement. I'll try @hungryperson11's recommendation.

I wanted to highlight my own strategy (work in progress), which I have arrived at after many confusing years (I don't mean to hijack the thread but it seems relevant and the thread is alive).

 

My Strategy:

1) Continue working with a dermatologist to find ways to calm the skin and reduce flushing - some options that have worked for me are Oracea (long term for flushing), prescription sodium sulfacetamide washes, and even laser treatment to some extent (questionable efficacy).

2) Find a cover-up solution that will help tone down the day-to-day redness and blushing by enough of a factor so as to relieve the anxiety about it. For me, even a 50% reduction might be enough to make it a non-issue.

3) Work with a psychiatrist to find a medication solution that can help with extreme blushing scenarios - like job interviews / public speaking events. For instance anti-anxiety meds (e.g.) Xanax and/or beta-blockers (Propranolol) to name a few options. Even just knowing that I have a solution for these extreme blushing scenarios would be incredibly reassuring. 

For me, this combination approach seems infinitely better than an Effexor/ETS option. Hopefully one day soon I'll have it perfected and can manage the issue with little worry.

Hope this helps someone,

G

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On 9/9/2018 at 11:07 PM, Jim said:

Has anyone ever asked a professional makeup artist?  I wonder if it’s possible to get something that works and is also invisible for a man to use 

I went to a few on the stores straight off the street, and none of them could find a product that worked. To be fair they weren't the proper makeup artists though.

If you pop into a MAC store and ask them for the one that helps with redness they'll know how to help you. I've used a lot of products and this one is the best by far and away.

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hi @hungryperson11

Thanks very much for your post. It's great to hear this works as i have been looking for something that won't look like makeup.

I have been using the tinted zincO suncreen which had good reviews from men saying it was unnoticeable. Tried it and it worked quite well but wasn't waterproof so was afraid if i sweat or it rained it would start to streak.

So its good that you mentioned that the mac concealer is waterproof also.

Do you need to cover your whole face with this or only the redness. Do you just cover your cheeks?

Also would you mind taking a before and after photo with this on, just curious how invisible it looks. You can blank out the rest of your face to just show the redness. No worries if you don't feel comfortable doing this i understand.

I'll give it a shot anything is worth a try. Also how long roughly does it take to apply as maybe i would not apply it everyday and just carry it with me so if i need i could nip to the toilets and put it on.

It's amazing just having a product to carry with you can help immensely with your mind just by knowing that if anything happens you can cover it up puts ease on the mind.

Also i should of noted i have rosacea so i mainly flush more than blush, main triggers heat and exercise. I presume the flush and blush are similar with the redness. I'm not expecting it to cover a full flush but would be happy if it concealed it by 30-40%.

Thanks again man really appreciate your advice and for helping us men.

Will def give this a try. Does the nc numbers indicate the colour. So which skin colour roughly is yours mine is not fully pale but slightly a shade darker. Will try the nc 15 to start off. Do you apply it with your finger or do you use a brush?

 

Many thanks :)

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On 9/20/2018 at 8:55 PM, BBB said:

hi @hungryperson11

Thanks very much for your post. It's great to hear this works as i have been looking for something that won't look like makeup.

I have been using the tinted zincO suncreen which had good reviews from men saying it was unnoticeable. Tried it and it worked quite well but wasn't waterproof so was afraid if i sweat or it rained it would start to streak.

So its good that you mentioned that the mac concealer is waterproof also.

Do you need to cover your whole face with this or only the redness. Do you just cover your cheeks?

Also would you mind taking a before and after photo with this on, just curious how invisible it looks. You can blank out the rest of your face to just show the redness. No worries if you don't feel comfortable doing this i understand.

I'll give it a shot anything is worth a try. Also how long roughly does it take to apply as maybe i would not apply it everyday and just carry it with me so if i need i could nip to the toilets and put it on.

It's amazing just having a product to carry with you can help immensely with your mind just by knowing that if anything happens you can cover it up puts ease on the mind.

Also i should of noted i have rosacea so i mainly flush more than blush, main triggers heat and exercise. I presume the flush and blush are similar with the redness. I'm not expecting it to cover a full flush but would be happy if it concealed it by 30-40%.

Thanks again man really appreciate your advice and for helping us men.

Will def give this a try. Does the nc numbers indicate the colour. So which skin colour roughly is yours mine is not fully pale but slightly a shade darker. Will try the nc 15 to start off. Do you apply it with your finger or do you use a brush?

 

Many thanks :)

If you find a colour that is the same as your skin tone you can just apply it to those parts. Personally I do it all over my face as well as the sides and front of my neck - the neck is just to guarantee there is no color difference between my neck and face. The nc line is especially for redness, the nw is for something else (not sure what). I'm pretty pale and I'm using the nc25 now. The nc15 and 20 made me look a little washed out but nc25 is perfect.

If I were you I'd get 2 or 3 shades and apply each to one side of face (not all at the same time obviously), then leave the other side clear. Under natural sunlight (easier to see imperfections) use a mirror to see how similar they are. If you have the confidence you could pop down to a MAC store and ask them for their professional advice about which one is best for you. 

As well I find it's a good idea to ask someone you're close to if they can see you have something on your face. The paranoia it looks like you're wearing makeup might stay until you're certain noone can notice. And with this stuff, as long as you get the color right, noone will. The confidence you have when you're certain noone notices really shines through versus when you're a little worried.

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Thanks for reply @hungryperson11
 

Reading back your posts really lifted my spirits. I ordered 3 versions NC 20,25,30.

So hopefully one of them should suit my skin colour.

Can you give me tips on your steps when applying this do you put moisturizer on first. On your post above you mention using a spray to set it. Is it easy to wash off at night do you just use face wipes.

Also I assume if you touch your face it would smudge would it or stain your clothes. But wouldn't worry about that too much. Could always reapply.

 

Thanks a million again :)

 

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On 10/4/2018 at 12:38 AM, BBB said:

Thanks for reply @hungryperson11
 

Reading back your posts really lifted my spirits. I ordered 3 versions NC 20,25,30.

So hopefully one of them should suit my skin colour.

Can you give me tips on your steps when applying this do you put moisturizer on first. On your post above you mention using a spray to set it. Is it easy to wash off at night do you just use face wipes.

Also I assume if you touch your face it would smudge would it or stain your clothes. But wouldn't worry about that too much. Could always reapply.

 

Thanks a million again :)

 

You should use a primer beforehand and a setting spray after. Both are so easy to use. And wipes will work fine!

Smudging is not an issue for some reason and it doesn't stain clothes.

Consider using it on your eyelids if you want to guarantee your eyes dont look a little red, but don't use on the eyebag area - that is the one place it will be noticeable. Also there's no need to use too much, a little will go a long way. 

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On 11/3/2018 at 10:16 PM, Justme said:

My experience dont use concealer or any makeup... sombody WILL notice it and that will destroy your self confidence even more

If you use a bad product, sure. That's the point of this thread - there is a product out there that provides excellent coverage and isn't noticeable.

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I'm struggling to see how people can put makeup on a red face without making it worse. My condition is so bad that if I put any kind of cream or talc or concealer on my face it just reacts and burns even more fiercely than normal. Covering up the pores just seals up the skin's ability to breathe so your face starts getting hotter and hotter (physical reaction, nothing to do with nerves), and the heat can't escape as it is trapped under the make-up. I have tried every product on the market but absolutely none of them can prevent my face reacting, and on a number of occasions this resulted in permanent damage with burst blood vessels. Even a light brushing of talcum powder to reduce the shine, which almost made me look normal again and filled me with hope, resulted in involuntary ferocious burning after about 45 mins and a serious worsening of my condition.

I just don't understand why no-one else seems to have this problem, judging by the comments. Maybe I am just uniquely cursed, but it would be good to know if anyone else has found the same issue.

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Hi Everyone, 

I'm using something that really works for me and that I find is undetectable if you don't overdo it.

I put a dab of Avéne - Antirougeurs Day (SPF 25) on the back of my hand. Then I add to it a tiny bit of green concealer. I use LA Girl - PRO Conceal (the green one). I then mix them together with my finger effectively diluting the green concealer. Then I take a cosmetic wedge (used for applying makeup - I use Cala Professional Non-Latex Cosmetic Wedge (rip the head off to create a really good bumpy surface for applying)), soak it in water then squeeze most of the water out, like a sponge. I dab the diluted green concealer on my red areas with my finger and then use the wedge to 'blend' it in, by just dabbing the skin, not smearing or wiping it. Very gentle dabs.

I've tried a ton of makeup and concealer type products and this works the best for me so far. It's totally undetectable if used sparingly and applied well. And it can tone down the redness so well. Don't go for full cover. Go for 50-80%. The beauty of it is also that I can apply more or less depending on my skin and/or the day I have ahead of me. I've used it for over a year and it's never once been detected. 

Anyway, I know there are plenty of products that work for different men, but this is what works best for me so far. 

Tldr:  I use a diluted green concealer on the red areas of my face - undetectable and can use less/more as needed.

G

 

PS - here's a link to my full routine if interested: 

 

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