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Paula

Shame

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I am in my sixties, and felt so much shame,because of my blushing, ..i seldom blush now,but when i was young i felt so much shame and i actually believed there was something mentally wrong with me,..that's how i believe i was made to feel,...i wasn't  mental i was emotionally disturbed ,because of constant "Bullying "!!!!......people and their word's can and does so much damage,..i remember reading online about a young boy who committed suicide because of his blushing phobia,....how sad is that!.

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Hi there Paula, 

Thank you for sharing, I can relate to what you wrote. What makes you rarely blush now? My mother also had severe blushing when she was younger, she is now 53 years old and never blushes. This is what makes me contemplate if I should do the surgery or not because it seems like this gets much better as you age for most.. Do you think it's because you have just trained your brain into not caring so much and by that I mean you aren't always anticipating blushing and thinking about it therefore it doesn't happen much anymore?

Also, have you ever considered doing the ETS surgery?

Kindly,
RosieFace

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To be honest Rosieface,..i dont know why i rarely blush,i believe as you say,it's an age thing,i was still blushing at 60,it was still on my mind,you know what it's like,24/7 blushing was on my mind,always thinking of ways,to avoid certain situations, which i knew i would blush in,shopping was the worst for me,i had to take valium to calm my anxiety, ..i covered up a lot,with a jacket and thick scarf in winter, as my neck was redder than my face,....

 

It must be a couple of year's now,since my life changed,isn't it sad though,that i had to go through all those years of hell,...i could never go through that again,..i did think about surgery,but GP said it isn't always successful, ...i must say,i am a stronger person for all that suffering ,..and will share my story if it helps other's, ...and also support them,....thank you for you're post,i am here if you need support, I'm glad you're mother is there for you,as she knows first hand what blushing feels like.

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I guess what this video suggest's amounts to  CBT,  learning to value & love yourself, both intentionally and internally. When shame based beliefs are internalized the subconscious defensive mechanism (blushing) will protect the organism from perceived threats. Rage may also show up as a more seemingly acceptable defense strategy. Catches me out sometimes when I sense my burning redness as a result of being called out or shamed deliberately.  

https://youtu.be/k_D7wGOu35g

Cashew

 

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