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blushingagain

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  1. Hi Kenco mate, yeah its a bit better these days. the only pain in the backside it these days is the beer induced flush if the pub is packed but nothing will stop me going on the beer and looking like this :oops: No one has ever mentioned it though in the 25 years of drinking in the pub so I think its more coz its totally burning im aware of it lol. this sounds crazy but if im flushed but not boiling, maybe coz im outside, i dont even give it a second thought, even though im probably as flushed outside if you know what I mean minus the searing burn lol. the obvious comparison is between in the pub and outside in the beer garden, equally flushed, one stinging, the other seemingly neutralised by the cooler outside temp and dont give it a second thought tbh. good to hear from you mate, im gonna drop you a private message...
  2. Hi Folks, its been a while. Things have improved greatly for me. I have not blushed for over 1.5 years, mainly because my work was my nemesis, predominantly office meetings in hot rooms that I had to endure every day. My jobs changed and so has my life for the better. To many years my pride got in the way and I figured If I fought this affliction and threw myself to the lions den, eventually it would dissipate and as I became accustomed to the scenario, my fear of blushing would diminish and id eventaully come out the other side. No way I hear you say and thats how it panned out. No matter how much I persevered, I was as anxious in meeting 1000 as the 1st one. I faced a decision, do I keep fighting this seemingly unwinnable battle and feel like sh** every day of my working life or do I look to change career. I have accepted that despite being more than academically capable and well thought of by my employer that I simply could not endure the daily torture. i now have a similar job but in a totally relaxed environment and do 99% of my meetings on conference calls. Bizarrrely, the associated panic that causes me to blush at work, does not cause me any problems outwith work so now I am never in a sitaution where I panic sufficiently to blush. I am the father of a toddler and he is the happiest most content lad we can wish for. I am naturally worried if he will adopt my propensity to blush of course. I realise that it wont really be able to be judge until hes a bit older. In my case, my problems began around the age of 13. As regard parent blushers, any of you guys got kids and able to provide any reassurance that this horrid conditions isnt necessarily passed on all the time? Im not naive enough to think that its not passed on sometimes, Ive read on here that it is. I just hoped that someone might be able to provide some information, maybe got a kid post 13 onwards who has not inherited it to. Im thought of as quite feisty to those that know me and thats probably ultimately whats got me through some of the woeful periods Ive had to endure but it would completely destroy me if I had to witness the wee one going through the same thing. Thanks folk.
  3. Has anyone else noticed that hes a bit of a pinker like us. Flushes really bad when under pressure, particularly at prime minister questions and especially when milliband is slating him. I noticed yesterday that as mps left the chamber more into the debate, his flush lessened (as would happen to me) as the pressure lessened. In small intimate settings as well, crowded where I presume its hot, hes sometimes bad. Now listen, I despise the conservaties but fair play to him. Obviously doesnt bother him as much as it bothers us.
  4. I was in a similar situation about 14 years ago, the woman in question is now my wife. I went out with her for about a year before I mentioned it even though, I thought she must notice. 1st date I went on with her after meeting her drunk in a nightclub where there was no pressure was a meal where I took the car. Small brightly lit restaurant which was in middle of summer and absolutely boiling. I had a glass of 'Red' lol, just one and some flush inducing meal. She didnt blink an eyelid. If she likes you and is human, she shall reassure you that it makes not one iota of difference as to the person you are. Tell her in straight forward terms how you feel and ask her how she preceives it. I know, like me, youll never really be reassured even if she says all the right things but to her it wont be an issue, I guarantee it.
  5. Hi folks, Ive really had a few difficult weeks, not to do with blushing. For the 1st time in years, blushing has not been my focus. Unfortunately, im in them middle of dealing with something quite traumatic involving my health. My persective has changed so much. Lately, my thoughts have been consumed by this health scare that Im going through. A bi product of this is that Ive not given blushing a second thought in all that time. Ive had meetings on the horizon at work, the type of thig Id hate in a small crowded room, very hot, the usual thing we hate and yet Ive not had time to dwell on it as Ive been to focused on this scare. Hopefully, Ill be officially ok soon but Ive shown myself unitentionally that wghen the focus is off the blushing, naturally it doesnt occur. In around 6-8 weeks, Ill be back, hopefully back to my normal self. I just wanted to share my experience and show that certainly in my case, it contributed to largely in my mind. That anxiety is fed to my mind which in turn makes me red. A different anxiety has replaced it, the mechanism of which is slightly different and its virtually stopped.
  6. no your not mozart but please try and put blushing to the back of your mind. your dads your dad and no one is going to even notice your blushing amidst the devestation and sorrow. Make your dads final moments cherished ones between you. blushing is nothing in comparison to saying goodbye to your dad. Im not being cruel, just dont want you to regret this in later life.
  7. depends what your triggers are mate. I feel free outside, I would never blush outside. I could have a meeting inside a hot room with a bunch of people and be red as a tomato. I could have the same meeting with the same people outside and be free as a bird. so for me, it would be somewhere you can be outside for long periods - spain/greece, may onwards - lovely long hot days and nice balmy eveings where you can eat and drink outside late into the evening where the temperature remains pleasant.. I know from reading on here though, hot climate can be peoples worse nightmare..
  8. Id be up for it but ONLY if it definitely happened. Ive seen they have fallen apart at the last minute before and id be coming from scotland on a 9hr train journey so could only come if it were a definite!
  9. Hi Sick of this, Ive worked in the hq of a huge firm, 1000 employees for the last 15 years. TBH it brings daily challenges as its really full of nightmare scenarios, big meetings, warm small rooms, presentations, you name it, the potential nightmare is there but I would recommend getting out there and trying to live with it rather than hiding from it if that makes sense. Yeah, its a pain in the ars* but its rewarding at the end of the week when the weekend is here and gives you real purpose. I truly beleive that sitting at home dwelling on it is miles worse for your mind. Dont be to ambitious initially, even a dead end job initiailly where your comfortable would be my advice. good luck.
  10. Sorry for late response mate! Yeah it was ok, nothing major on the embarrasment barometer tbh. When do you start the new job, must be soon, good luck! Back working myself wed after being off since xmas eve, not looking forward to it, not from any blushing perspective though, just the same as the average joe. Returning to work after the festive season is always a bit deflating as you know! Not for you though, as youll be nervous/excited about the job. Take confidence from the interview. You obviously done well and either never blushed or you did but the interviewee(s) considered it an insignificance which it is! Interviews are a real source of contradiction for me. For some reason, Im ultra confident in them and always seem to do well. Its when I start, a meeting round the table with even the same people who conducted the interview is a nightmare! Must be something to do with escapeism I suppose. At an interview, at that point, there is no obligation to ever come back and I must be calmer as a result. The pysche changes after that I suppose when the inescapable reality of having to go there every day kicks in. My body must then become more alert to any 'danger'! lol even though theres absoloutely none as me and you both know rationally thinking!
  11. Happy new year when it comes fellow redfacateers! Up in the scottish highlands at my inlaws tonight. Mother in law babysitting unexpectedly allowing me and the mrs to go to the local pub on hogmanay to see in the new year to the wee small oors! Cant wait! Red face or not, im looking forward to it despite it being the type of place thats normally our nemesis! Relatively small pub, roaring log fire, hardly any room to move as so busy. Difficult to get to the bar, a scotsmans nightmare! All the best, our face is but a small part of our being, remember that. Nobody else gives a fk!
  12. Its tommorow mate, nothing to major. Just another flush fest to add to my back catalouge :oops: Nothing new, been through it a million times before, yeah you feel like a total fanny but it passes as you know. Even worse than normal though as tommorow ive got a xmas lunch, 3 courser in the works canteen just b4 the meeting in question. With it being the canteen, as expected, its cheap sh1te so my flush might me bad even by my standards, probably burn a hole in the carpet - lol Ill need to take it easy with the food though as in all honesty that shall crank up the looking like a cockometer pretty quickly. Ive changed my mind about ETS again, ive decided im not doing it ever. The wee man arrived 12 weeks ago as you know and its given me fresh impetus and perspective. Its such hard work, Ive simply not had time to dwell on things I might have done in the past and as a result, the anxious tension although it maybe appears in relation to the situation, it appears to late in the day for me to be at my previous angst levels if that makes sense. I would say I find this affliction more 'bearable' than some. Dont get me wrong, its sh1t but I think youve got to get out and about rather than becoming a hermit and going down the path of self pity as that would add depression into the mix and phuck that being thrown in to. I do wish jamie 10 would post and give us an update some 18 months down the line. I hope hes ok as I know he was annoyed by CS but id love to know how he feels now a considerable time after the honeymoon period has elapsed. Wonder if his FB is still elimated. I so hope that his non appearance here means that it is. I was gonna go with the same surgeon as him so im always intrigued as to his progress. Im hoping to convince my missus to have a second one and that would defo mean I was to tired to worry about anything. However, it is necessary to get a ride to instigate the process and I cant get a nod off a donkey at the present moment! Newcastle eh, some top tottie down there on a friday and saturday night, once you get beyond the newcastle top cladded males and females in the bigg market of course - lol Anyway mate, keep in touch and let us know how your getting on. Be proud of yourself mate, I know its corny as fk but I can relate to how difficult this move would be for you. Im sure youll be fine. As you say, youve seeen people bliush and thought nothing of it. We are our own worst critic, I just pray to god the wee man doesnt get this sh1t, that would break my heart.
  13. Congratulations mate and hats off to you for having the balls to go for it. We either sit back and let our lives stagnate into a depressive state of disrepair or we understand as you clearly do that it happens and we have to live our lives regardless as best we can. Blushing does not have to mean we dont suceed. Yes it feels sh1te at the time but it passes. 24 hrs from now, Ive got a work related task that im not looking forward to. 26 hrs from now ill be relieved it past and wondering what I was worrying about! As I say, takes some bottle but its the best thing for you, otherwise you wouldnt do it. All the very best. Ps - where you off to in the country?
  14. I havent mate but for me this type of thing can just make things worse. Ultimately this an an anxiety condition, whether its anxiety causing blushing or blushing causing anxiety, Im not sure. No offence intended but for me, clinging to this type of nonsense leads to one outcome, being p1ssed off when it doesnt work and normally losing money no doubt. Spend the money on a nice meal out and say 'who gives a fk' if my face is red.
  15. Hi guys, this might be on interest you you. A genuine perception of my blushing from my doc. I was at the docs today to get an anti flu jag which I get as ive got asthma. Its just the practice nurse that administers the needle. She had to leave the room for a bit whilst I was in there and I noticed that on her computer was my notes from prev visits. I had a quick look as she was away for a few mins and on the screen was my full history since I went to him a few years ago re my FB. Most of it was just a synopsis of my concerns but a few parts referred a bit more in depth about my last appt where I did blush. I remember it well as I felt boiling, sticky, the usual nightmare scenario really. I left that day feeling like Id made a right t1t of myself. however, his notes of that day made me feel better today. My doc has been really good. His notes read, 'further consultaion regarding fb/flushing occuring in high anxiety work situations. Restricting career development/progress. Vasolidation occured during chat although not visibly extreme'. This is the 1st time I have ever really seen someones perception and true opinion. Obviously the doctor did not think I would ever see this. I have been told my people Im going Red but equally from people who care about me, its not as bas as I think and shouldnt allow it to restrict me. Tbh, Ive never beleived them but my doc has/had no reason to butter me up as as far as he was concerned id never see this. I suppose my point is that I left the surgery that day really down, pereceiving that I was some sort of Red Freak whom everyone could see but in reality, its only really me that sees it as this major problem. Could it possibly be that the anxiety of being hot and red is making me think its much worse than it actually is? Im only mentioning it as I know we have all been patronised at some point if we have seeked medical help and never really beleived anyones reassurance that 'its not that bad' but heres my doc sort of indirectly helping me more by simply typing something on this computer as opposed to 'helping' during a consultation. Made me feel good anyway, a wee bit.
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